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Thursday, September 25, 2014

Sissy - Here's to you!

Here are a few things that I absolutely admire about you (some of which incidentally also make me go green with envy at times ;))

You're taller than me... I literally have to look up to you!
You're stronger than me... I cannot even imagine the kind of strength it would take someone in your shoes to put up with people and their idiosyncrasies. You can take blow after blow, pick yourself up and keep walking, with a smile.
You've always been there... for me, and for the family. Even when i thought an ostrich was a great role model and stuck my head in the sand, you made sure to take care of everything so that the storms pass me by.
You can cook... and I'm not even a good eater - I've been certified a fussy eater too many times even to allude to being a foodie!
And, you are, truly, beautiful!

Monday, April 21, 2014

Simple Genius - simply superb!


Simple Genius is my third book penned by Baldacci - and I had great expectations already (my first had been First Family, and second was Hour Game, which preludes Simple Genius).
Its a fast paced read, keeping the suspense intact till the very last pages; although I must admit that the subplot involving Michelle's past had me turning the pages with more enthusiasm than the actual story itself!
The book follows the protagonist duo - Sean King and Michelle Maxwell through some intense times. A financially hard pressed Sean turns to his ex-girlfriend for an assignment, whereas the events of the previous book have left Michelle in a bit of a psychological mess (understandably so)... Michelle is checked into a mental care institution, where she tries to pick up the pieces of her life after a suicide attempt (with some help from Sean's psychologist friend, Horatio). Sean is assigned to dig into a fishy murder at a laboratory which turns out to be much more than he signed up for!
Sean finds himself caught up in a web of intricate lies and deceit spun by two clandestine institutions, each treating the other as its sworn enemy; Michelle discovers that at the care facility, its not just those admitted who are mentally disturbed! She solves a murder, exposes a racket and rushes to Sean's side when things start to get sticky and violent... Sean and Michelle befriend the autistic daughter (an extraordinary genius) of the victim, and uncover some shocking truths behind it all! Through all of this, Horatio, on his quest to help Michelle come to terms with her past (although I could chalk it up to morbid curiosity), grudgingly tags along the duo on their adventures - and at the end of the book, is finally able to help Michelle put her demons to rest.
Quite an interesting read, though at times, as I mentioned earlier, the subplot took over and ran forward. 

Monday, January 6, 2014

A WISH RIGHT NOW….

A typical romantic at heart, I believe in magic, fairies and shooting stars. So, when given a chance, what would I wish for?
In my not-so-long life, I've made some bloopers, agreed, but would I trade in all the fun to save myself the embarrassment? Nope.
Take back something I did (or said) to hurt someone? Nope, it taught me to be more careful.
Perhaps erase a hurtful memory? Nope, it made me stronger.

So, what would I wish for? I think I would settle for an interesting life (not that I've had a dull moment so far, but I wouldn't give it up for anything-or anyone) ;)

On The Percipice

“The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are. You trade in your reality for a role. You trade in your sense for an act. You give up your ability to feel, and in exchange, put on a mask.” ― Jim Morrison

Almost one year in the job, and I had come to realize the truth in the quote above!  The job is excellent, office amazing. But, I feel that I'm missing something... I want more. There is growth, yes; but it takes time and patience, both of which I cannot seem to spare ;)


There comes a point in our lives when we have to stop fooling ourselves into thinking life is gonna be the way we want it to be; start seeing things for how they really are… 

Nineteen months here, am i outdated?

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Weighing the scales/Tipping of the scales


As every coin has two sides, every prospect has its own pros and cons. It is upon us to weigh them carefully and decide how the scales tip.
Agreed the common path is smoother and easier to trod, but the road less taken promises greater adventures. And if I were to take my fluttering heart into account, all that it wanted to do was throw caution to the winds and “sail away”!

(Curiosity might have killed the cat, but it sure gave me my “new life”)
As was expected, I was flooded with calls from “concerned” relatives each of which invariably contained the underlying message that I could still go back to my “options” and start over with a clean slate. Yet, what they failed to realize was that I was happy with my choice – one that I had taken after careful consideration of the pros and cons.
[Initially, I tried explaining it to them; but after about a year of doing so, I knew it was in vain and stopped. I wanted to learn my own lessons; see for myself what the ‘big bad world’ was like. Although it was slightly intimidating in the beginning, I soon learnt that all I had to do was to hold my own.]
Every time my parents called, they would pick up a new point to argue on. Their favorite one still remains that my current job has nothing to do with what I studied – “What are you doing in a call center or a bank for that matter, when you are qualified to be a journalist?” And my standard reply would be that I love my job (initially, I tried explaining how my degree assisted me in doing a better job at communicating, but they simply wouldn’t hear of it!)
My qualification was good enough to land me a good job at a respectable media house, but not enough to guarantee a “stable” job – one that had fixed timings, fixed remuneration, and benefits. And that was the kind of job that I was looking out for! My position with the bank offered me the better of two worlds: the timings were consistent; job guaranteed and it also helped me hone my communication skills in the meanwhile.
Eventually, the relatives gave up; leaving my parents alone in their “struggle to make me see sense”. And with the obvious happiness that I have found, they too now find it hard to argue me down. Though my mother still tries at times to play the guilt card, I know I have won the battle.

On The Anvil




As in the Shakespeare classic, yours truly too is stuck in the moral dilemma – to be or not to be. This situation becomes all the more aggravating when your personal interests stand to be at complete odds with those of your family and friends.
Yours truly comes from a long line of overachievers (excluding her immediate family of course!). It is but natural that all eyes are on every move that she makes (or does not make for that matter…). So, when it was her turn to choose a career, she was given the “valid options”– Engineering, Medicine or a career with one of the IT giants at the time. However, all the glitz and glamour of a high profile, highly paid job with any giant could not persuade her to give up on her dream to set out on her own path – a road less taken. And much to the chagrin of her parents, she chose to do a BA in Mass Communication & Journalism and further opted for a bank job.
[Taking up the job in the service sector led to many eyebrows being raised and questions asked; as there obviously were other more lucrative jobs on the offer. But then again I listened to what my heart had to say. For as the adage goes, at a later date, you regret the things you did not do more than those you did. ]
Six months into the job, I turn around today to take stock and stand at the precipice.
Inexorably, I had expected myself to excel immediately; to rise and shine in this new field. What I had overlooked was that not everyone is good at everything – it took time and effort to learn and hone skills and deliver excellence. This slight on my behalf led to quite a lot of avoidable despair. I was miserable to learn that I wasn’t meeting expectations when it had become a habit to excel. College friends who learnt of my job said “Why is the class topper stuck in a call center job?! What are you doing with your life?” Relatives (and parents) took it upon themselves to counsel me and ‘make me see sense’. Nevertheless, I had the one reason that trumped all – I love my job; love what I do and do what I love. On the other hand my average performance on the job and constant questioning from my peers had sown the seeds of reservation in my mind.
[It was at this time that I was confronted with the fact that all I needed to do was be open to learning. I needed to unlearn a few things, learn a few others; relinquish a few old habits and pick up some new ones. Needless to say, it was hard but requisite].
That is how I come to stand at crossroad of sorts: to be the nonconformist and continue on the path less trodden, stumbling and recouping or to take the easy way out, sticking to a monotonous routine which guarantees demarcated benefits and achievements.To let my heart rule as always or let my head take over.

Monday, August 13, 2012

Conscious?

Maroon Cream
Peach
Spin
Disorientation
Caution
Each man for his own
Do I hear you?
Of Course!
Smile
Sarcasm
Strike-blow.


Start new
a fresh page...
Damage done
Undo.

Dreams - hopes - visions
wisps of smoke
Castles of glass
Shattered.

Saturday, June 16, 2012

<3 Movies/Books <3


Some movies you see, some you watch, some you chew on and a few you relish. Very few movies, like good books, leave you with an aftertaste, a yearning and longing to relive the entire experience. The glory of the glorious, their inflated pride, the simpler joys of the not-so-glorious, the different facets of life and art… People, personalities, society, mentalities shaped by the social rules – very few works of art have succeeded in capturing these diverse views and presenting them as a panoramic view of the world. Some movies that I feel come very close to this are Troy, King Arthur, Titanic, Independence Day, Crash, & Butterfly on a Wheel. (Since I am yet to watch other "classics" as they are often referred to as, the list might seem a little to short.)


Embarrassing though it is to admit, I watched Titanic only very recently. And fell in love with it - totally, irrevocably and completely. It is one of the movies you relish, taking them one bite at a time, savoring the texture (in the cinematography, story, characters...) Can you just imagine the grandeur, the finery, the lush luxuriousness of it all? Suits, polished shoes, gowns & corsets, tiaras and glitters, hair combs, grace and elegance, poise – somehow I can only associate it all to the British. (Guess being ruled over for over two centuries tends to leave an imprint!)

So, here I encourage you all to go ahead and share your experiences - movies you fell in love with, books you just cannot forget.. :)

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Do i hold on...

There are times when we are faced with a very difficult choice - a truth that hurts or a lie that heals. Do we hold on to an illusion or let go to fall back on reality? Often, we choose to hold on with a hope of the illusion forming our reality. But many a times, holding on only leads us into a greater mess. So, when I am faced with this dilemma, what do i do? Do I hold on? Or do I let go?
I have learnt from one of the best teachers - life. And a hard learnt lesson is that the truth, however bitter, always wins out. Lies, even if they are only white lies, are bound to lose in the long run. So, make the right choice and make it count. Let go of what you know is not going to work out. It will be very hard to, I promise, but I also promise you will not regret it later. Remember, even good things fall apart, but only so that better things can fall into place.
Take up every opportunity, let go of what you have been holding on to for so long, take a few chances and you might just realize this was what you really wanted! If someone really belongs with you, don't hold them too close. Give them their space and at times, let go. Watch them come back to you and know that this is love. <3

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Life's a Party!!!!


She's into superstitions
Black cats and voodoo dolls
Well, I feel a premonition
That girl's gonna make me fall

She's into new sensations
New kicks in the candlelight
She's got new addictions
For every day and night

She'll make you take your clothes off
And go dancing in the rain
She'll make you live her crazy life
But she'll take away your pain
Like a bullet to your brain

Upside inside out
She's livin' la vida loca
She'll push and pull you down
Livin' la vida loca

Her lips are devil red
And her skin's the color mocha
She will wear you out
Livin' la vida loca
Livin' la vida loca
She's livin' la vida loca

Woke up in New York City
In a funky cheap hotel
She took my heart and she took my money
She must've slipped me a sleepin' pill

She never drinks the water
Makes you order French champagne
Once you've had a taste of her
You'll never be the same
Yeah, she'll make you go insane!

Upside inside out
She's livin' la vida loca
She'll push and pull you down
Livin' la vida loca

Her lips are devil red
And her skin's the color mocha
She will wear you out
Livin' la vida loca
Livin' la vida loca
She's livin' la vida loca

She'll make you take your clothes off
And go dancing in the rain
She'll make you live her crazy life
But she'll take away your pain
Like a bullet to your brain

Upside inside out
She's livin' la vida loca
She'll push and pull you down
Livin' la vida loca

Her lips are devil red
And her skin's the color mocha
She will wear you out
Livin' la vida loca

Upside inside out
She's livin' la vida loca
She'll push and pull you down
Livin' la vida loca

Her lips are devil red
And her skin's the color mocha
She will wear you out
Livin' la vida loca
Livin' la vida loca
She's livin' la vida loca

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Most of the shadows in our life are created by us standing in our own sunlight. - Ralph Waldo Emerson. 
Why is it that most of us see the tiny black smudge on the paper and overlook the crisp whiteness of the rest of the page? Why do we squander our time  waiting for opportunity to knock on our doors instead of taking the initiative? Is it true that life is all about doing the right thing at the right time?
No, there is more to life than that. It matters not whether you have a fat paycheck, but that you can spare a penny for the needy. Not that everyone laughs at your jokes, but that you bring a smile on someone's face. Not that you have years of experience and can do a better job, but that you can make a difference. You are not defined by your color, creed, race or sex. You are defined by your choices, your thoughts and actions, your strength to make lemonade when life hands you lemons.
Easier said than done, but all it takes is some effort. For those who know, there's a song by Fort Minor, that goes, "This is ten percent luck, fifteen percent skill, twenty percent concentrated power of will, five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain and a hundred percent reason to remember the name". Each of us is unique, with a completely different set of skills and abilities. Our talent is God's gift to us, and how well we use it is our gift back to God. Our life is a continuous process of creating an image that best describes us - our emotions, our choices, our likes and dislikes...
So, stop blaming others, start taking responsibility and make a difference - a good one. Let people know you chose to be who you are, and are proud of it. Ensure that someone's life is brightened by your existence. After all, a life well lived is best described as one whose memory brings a smile onto a person's face.


Haath ki lakeer ko, modta marodta hai honsla..

Monday, July 4, 2011

spin

i watch life go by... i live, yet wait for life to start...
black, blue, pink,
green, yellow
a bright flash
and all goes blank...
time stands still,
the world spins.
A green leaf,
refreshed by rain
the droplet slips,
falls to the ground.
time flies again,
waves crash on the shore.
i stand still, as the world spins around me..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_Rut4qm33g

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Trial and Error - a way of life


“Action and reaction, ebb and flow, trial and error, change - this is the rhythm of living. Out of our over-confidence, fear; out of our fear, clearer vision, fresh hope. And out of hope, progress.” - Bruce Barton.

If there's one way of never failing, it is by learning from one's mistakes. No mistake is a failure, unless you learn nothing from it. I too have made quite a few mistakes in the small part of life that I have lived so far. And I have learnt a lesson from each one of them… some difficult, some not so difficult. One can never get ahead in life without trying anything new. As the outcome is not always certain, it may involve a certain amount of risk.
One of the new things I have tried recently in my life is getting a job. When faced with the need to support myself financially, I decided to get a job. Easy as it may sound, it is one herculean task to get a job, and another to keep it. I began my search by creating and uploading my resume on a leading job search site. Within a few days I was called for an interview. Unaware of what to expect, I noted the appointment timings, and reached the venue well ahead of the designated time. On being called in for the interview, I went with my certificates and resume, thinking of a hundred different ways in which I might be rejected, and a hundred more in which I might be accepted…
After speaking to the interviewers, I realized that this was not what I wanted – the timings were long, pay small and no satisfaction in the job. I had to say no, but did not know how to do so without sounding arrogant. So, I messed up my written test on purpose and left for home dejected. But this was just the beginning.
A day later, I received another call from another company, offering the same position, with a better experience and greater satisfaction. Wondering if it was safe to expect anything better than the previous one, I reached the venue on time.
I was struck by the atmosphere at the office – discipline blended with friendliness, results attained with passion and a professional outlook. Here was a place I could learn and grow. At the end of the day, I was told that I had been shortlisted for the job, and was to be on probation for a week before getting a confirmation. So, I started work on a fine Monday morning. As luck would have it, I began work in the new branch of the firm. It was a completely new experience, one that threw my entire world out of balance. Earlier, my world used to be wrapped up in myself, my books, movies and the small circle of friends that I had. But now my world has expanded in all directions, opening different worlds of possibilities in every matter.
Yet, when I look back, I wonder if this bliss I feel is only temporary, and if I actually made a huge mistake by letting go of everything I used to hold on to… Maybe, just maybe, this is not the way I was meant to be. Or maybe it is…
Only time can tell, as I’ve taken up the age old method of living – by trial and error. If this is meant to last, it will; else, I will find another way. But until then, the world is waiting for me, I belong here.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

TELL ME YOUR DREAMS – SIDNEY SHELDON



If you love thrillers, here’s a treat for all of you. Unlike others, this book will make sure you use your brains. A fast-paced read, there are numerous twists and turns, aptly placed.
The master storyteller, Sidney Sheldon toys with Multiple Personality Disorder also known as Dissociative Identity Disorder. The protagonist of the story, Ashley Patterson is a victim of MPD. She goes through a roller coaster of a life, and as the story progresses, a seed of doubt is sowed in the reader’s mind – is she the victim, or the predator?
The story begins with a day in the life of each character, Ashley Patterson, Antoinette Prescott, and Alette Peters. Each one of them has a different life, and in the course of the story, each one’s life is turned upside down when they are charged for murdering and castrating their closest ones. Suffering from a traumatic childhood and an abusive father, Ashley ruptures into three distinct characters, each of whom has a different outlook towards life. The characters are so diversified; they seem poles apart, facilitating deception of the mind. The plot has been skillfully handled, allowing the reader to enjoy the full impact of every twist.
The rest of the book is about how Ashley narrowly escapes the gallows, and is cured of her disorder.
The best part of the book though is its brilliant ending. Sheldon takes the final bow for the exemplary finale – the book is open ended. Just when you thought the fun has ended, Sheldon brings back Ashley’s alter, leaving one wondering whether the fun just got over, or did it just start...
The book is a definite page –turner, to use a clichéd adjective.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

The Rest of my life...

It is common belief that after a certain number of years, or at a certain age one reaches a level of maturity that helps them to decide what they want to spend the rest of their lives doing. Though there has been much discussion and debate on this under various pretences, one is yet to reach a concrete decision...
Hence, what exactly is the age when one decides, ‘Yes, I will become this’? All of us past that age, or those who have made that decision already know that it is not so much the age, rather the identification of one’s intrinsic abilities and talents that ascertains one’s goals and therefore, the future. One’s maturity is what counts.
Yet, this gives rise to a paradox question – Do we ever make that decision?
Is it mandatory for each one of us to? Can one not live one’s life by the day? This incertitude arises mainly because had it been such a necessity, there would not be so many disillusioned and wandering souls, would there? (!) I for one have not decided what I will become in future. I do not want to limit myself in any way, or bind myself to one line forever – which does not mean I will not completely devote myself to whatever I do! Rather, I want to try my hand at as many things as possible, have a happy career in a line I’m good in, and still keep my options open!!:) Moreover, when I say so, I am sure I am not the only one to be so. I am still to reach that stage when I feel that I can spend the rest of my life doing this. This discussion brings to my mind the very beautiful thought, “Variety is the spice of life”, which if I may, I would like to modify, as “Variety is the salt of life”, as spice is not needed half as much as salt!
History holds water to the fact that one person can be good at more than one thing in one’s life. One should strive continuously to find all those things that one is good at, and take advantage of one’s skill. One should hone one’s skills to perfection. Of course, it is a completely different issue that nobody is perfect! ;)
Therefore, I will spend the rest of my life without dwindling my time in thoughts such as “the rest of my life, I will…”

If Looks Could Kill...

A wary glance and an “Oh!” is what I’m generally regarded with when I mention that a majority of my close friends are boys. Then it leads to an unnecessary squeeze of my mother’s hand and a sympathetic glance towards her, followed by me running for the nearest exit, doubling with laughter, or me staring daggers at the intruder.
This scene takes place every time someone drops by to “see” me (as if Ito check whether I’ve grown horns, or sprouted a tail!); but the intrinsic (and sic) purpose being to hand me a list of things they want me to bring back on my next visit. People who don’t recognize us across the street turn up the moment I come home!
Yes, almost all my close friends happen to be boys, and contrary to that thought buzzing around in your head, I’ve never had a single “boyfriend”. I find it easy to get along with most people, but what really turns me off is narrow mindedness. Some people find it hard to grasp the fact that “boy” +”friend” ”boyfriend”. Back in my school days, after my board exams, I had a get together at my place, which was attended by around 11 boys, as the girls were too busy shopping, and holidaying (or worrying!); and had to endure the entire neighborhood peeking through their curtains… my mom had to grin and bear their “looks” for quite some time. The last time I visited my parents, our (suddenly-) friendly neighbor came to “see” me. My friend called up to ask when he could visit us, and I was blasé enough to tell my mom about it in front of her. Immediately, the neighbor exclaimed “How nice dear, I assume your parents will be there when you meet him?” That was the end of my patience – I glared daggers at her, wishing looks could kill, and retorted, “yes, they will, but only because he wants to meet them. My parents know me very well, and I’m glad to say that they trust me.”
In spite of such incidents, my parents and I have not lost faith – we still believe that one day our society shall wake up. But until then, people are just lucky that looks can’t kill!