On The Anvil

As in the Shakespeare classic, yours truly too is stuck in the moral dilemma – to be or not to be. This situation becomes all the more aggravating when your personal interests stand to be at complete odds with those of your family and friends.

Yours truly comes from a long line of overachievers (excluding her immediate family of course!). It is but natural that all eyes are on every move that she makes (or does not make for that matter…). So, when it was her turn to choose a career, she was given the “valid options”– Engineering, Medicine or a career with one of the IT giants at the time. However, all the glitz and glamour of a high profile, highly paid job with any giant could not persuade her to give up on her dream to set out on her own path – a road less taken. And much to the chagrin of her parents, she chose to do a BA in Mass Communication & Journalism and further opted for a bank job.

[Taking up the job in the service sector led to many eyebrows being raised and questions asked; as there obviously were other more lucrative jobs on the offer. But then again I listened to what my heart had to say. For as the adage goes, at a later date, you regret the things you did not do more than those you did. ]

Six months into the job, I turn around today to take stock and stand at the precipice.

Inexorably, I had expected myself to excel immediately; to rise and shine in this new field. What I had overlooked was that not everyone is good at everything – it took time and effort to learn and hone skills and deliver excellence. This slight on my behalf led to quite a lot of avoidable despair. I was miserable to learn that I wasn’t meeting expectations when it had become a habit to excel. College friends who learnt of my job said “Why is the class topper stuck in a call center job?! What are you doing with your life?” Relatives (and parents) took it upon themselves to counsel me and ‘make me see sense’. Nevertheless, I had the one reason that trumped all – I love my job; love what I do and do what I love. On the other hand my average performance on the job and constant questioning from my peers had sown the seeds of reservation in my mind.

[It was at this time that I was confronted with the fact that all I needed to do was be open to learning. I needed to unlearn a few things, learn a few others; relinquish a few old habits and pick up some new ones. Needless to say, it was hard but requisite].

That is how I come to stand at crossroad of sorts: to be the nonconformist and continue on the path less trodden, stumbling and recouping or to take the easy way out, sticking to a monotonous routine which guarantees demarcated benefits and achievements.To let my heart rule as always or let my head take over.